Being a Good Father: When You Didn’t Have One

It’s hard enough to deal with the absence of a parent when you’re a little kid but the impact doesn’t stop as time goes on. The role of a father-figure is very important to children’s formative years, both in their emotional and social development. Beyond that, as you grow older and start your own family, you still may feel that lack of a father figure in your life and for men that could affect how you handle fatherhood.


Touré Roberts

Touré discusses how to understand pain and recognize brokenness in his recently launched book, Wholeness Winning in Life From the Inside Out. Additionally, he offers advice on the importance of building a happy home… physically and emotionally.  A few points he’s expanded on are: 

How can you be a good father? Is there a definition to a good father?

  •              Fathering first of all has to do with covering. It’s to provide an environment that affirms, nourishes, and provides space for his children to grow and evolve to their potential.

What is the importance of having a strong father figure in your life?

•             Generally speaking, the role of each parent differs, however, the father provides encouragement, confidence, and a sense of safety and affirmation to the child. He gives the child the confidence to spread out their wings and soar.

Where does pain come from?

  •  Pain can come from a variety of places but one general place that most people experience pain is from the hurt of rejection. This is why one of the fathers primary roles is to exude acceptance, affirmation, and a sense of value in the presence of his children.

At what point do you acknowledge that you are broken from your childhood? How Can you move on from the past?

  •  The sooner you acknowledge your brokenness the better. Unacknowledged brokenness only perpetuates itself. You can move on from the brokenness by taking steps to reprocess the events that led to the pain. Through this reprocessing you can discover a healthier narrative concerning what happened and this is the beginning of healing.
Touré Roberts and wife Sarah.

Touré Roberts and wife Sarah.

Touré Roberts is founder of The Potter’s House at One LA, one of the fastest growing churches in Los Angeles, and the lead pastor of The Potter’s House of Denver. He is the author of Purpose Awakening and is a sought-after international speaker for his revelatory messages on purpose, identity, spiritual growth and relationships. He has been a featured guest on numerous local and national television programs and has more than 15 million views online. Roberts has several hundred thousand followers on social media who subscribe to his weekly inspirational and transformative messages. Roberts is the son-in-law of megachurch pastor and author T. D. Jakes. He and his wife, Sarah, live in both LA and Denver with their family.